


Where Is She?

by CarnivalofBrokenDolls (yourrhinestoneeyes)



Category: Suicide Squad (2016)
Genre: Depression, F/M, Harley and Jeannie more in mentioning, Hurt, Mental Illness, killing joke relation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-22
Updated: 2016-07-22
Packaged: 2018-07-26 03:15:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7558015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrhinestoneeyes/pseuds/CarnivalofBrokenDolls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where is she, that's a question he's been asking for years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where Is She?

This was not okay.

No, no, no this was far from okay.

His mind felt busy, it felt crowded, and there was something nearly suffocating about all the emotions and these thoughts cluttering his brain. This wasn’t normal, this wasn’t how he should be feeling.

Where was she?

Joker had been on edge ever since getting released, not that he was supposed to be released so early, but he had money and he had paid men toting machine guns. Those sorts of things and loose morals working in the prisons and mental institutes almost always guaranteed him an early release, for that Joker was grateful. The problem was that unlike him, unlike him with his status he had spent years working for Harley did not have these things. When Batman had caught the two of them he had told the men and women in bullet proof vests to separate them. He was not to have an inkling of any kind as to where they were taking her and she was not to know where he was taken to. 

If he’d been more careful they wouldn’t have been caught.

Fuck.

Fuck no why did he care, why was there this horrible pain in his skull?

She was replaceable.

Right, yeah, yeah she could be replaced.

He paced around their bedroom, his bedroom. The room was pristine and large; it was decorated in white and gold. He found himself at the vanity she spent so much time at, he found himself going through her things. He ran his fingers along the gold chain necklaces he had bought for her, the varying collars he had gotten that she always loved, he looked at the insane amount of makeup that she owned. He found himself picking up her black eye liner and looking at it, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. She was haunting his mind more than any person he had ever taken the life of.

He could hear the ghost of her laugh, feel her hands pressed against his chest and her lips against his cheek and chin. He could practically smell her perfume and taste the sweetness of her lips.

Why was she different?

He fucking hated this girl, this half ass psychiatrist who went out of her way to prove herself to him. What gave her the right to make him feel things?

He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and noticed his frown, he noticed the forming lines and wrinkles in his skin. Unhappiness wasn’t rare for him, but he hid it well. He hid everything beneath a joke and a homicide or two, this was harder to hide. He took the liner he held in his hand and began drawing thick black lines around his mouth until he completed a smile around his own frowning lips.

Stupid woman.

Stupid her, stupid him, and stupid Batman for catching up to them. He never thought they would get caught, he’d been cocky almost cockier than he used to be back in the day. Back before he had her to worry about, back before he had to worry about Batman thinking she needed saving.

He tossed the eye liner to the side and wandered out of the bedroom and into the connecting bathroom that nearly matched the size of his bedroom. Just like most rooms in the mansion it was all whites and gold, he’d bathe her in gold if she asked he would tell her. She’d have the whole God damn world if she asked him in that voice, every touch brought something out in him. 

Where were they hiding her, where was Harley Quinn? Why the fuck did they think they had the right to keep him of all people far from her? 

He needed her and he loathed that more than anything else in this stinking world. Something about her, something in her caused an aching in his brain like there was something in the back of his mind begging to be brought to the front. 

This aching angered him.

He let out a frustrated growl and kicked the trash bin by the toilet over. Paper and bloody tissues spilled onto the floor along with something more.

He knelt down on the cold tiled floor, he rummaged through the garbage and picked up what appeared to be two pregnancy tests.

Pregnancy tests.

Positive pregnancy tests.

His mind for a moment frizzed out, he blacked out. That aching, itching, and burning in his brain intensified while he knelt on the floor staring down at the pieces of plastic with glassy eyes.

‘Jack?’

So familiar, Jack; he was…..Jack…..He used to be, that had been his name once upon a time hadn’t it?

Once upon a time ago he’d been a scrawny fellow with shaggy brown hair, so meek and stuttering. He had lived in a dump in the worst part of Gotham. She had never minded though, but he wanted to give her the world.

‘What’s wrong baby?’

So soothing, her voice was so sweet and gentle. The feeling of her hands caressing his cheek, she held him and consoled him.

‘It’s okay love, you’ll get the next one.’

‘I’m sorry Jeannie, I’m such a screw up I just want to do my best for you.’

Jeannie….Her name yeah Jeannie, so beautiful she had been.

‘Jack I have something to tell you.’

He had held her in his arms, she had been so happy and yet there was some anxiety in her bright eyes. Her eyes that looked at him with love and devotion, he would give her everything if he could, but his comedy acts never took off.

‘What is it?’

‘Jack, I’m pregnant’

“Pregnant”

He’d never been happier, never been more ecstatic and now he was filled with determination to do whatever he had to do to give her the world.

“Jeannie?”

‘I’m sorry Jack, but…..There was an accident and she’s gone Jack.’

Gone…..No she couldn’t be gone, where was she?

“Where is she?”

His own voice startled him, the memories began to seep back into the depths of his brain. He looked back at the pregnancy tests that he held in his hand, he dropped them and quickly got to his feet. He stumbled his way back into the bedroom and collapsed onto the chair in front of the vanity.

How long had she known, had she just found out before they had gone out the other night?

Why hadn’t she told him, was she planning on telling him or not at all?

Where was she, what were they going to do to her?

The pain he was feeling was so bad that he almost wanted to start clawing at his scalp to get it out.

“Where is she?” He asked again with such a strong mixture of fear and hatred in his voice that it even caught him by surprise.


End file.
